Hello – I’m back, crazier than ever lol
Happy Holidays! I realize it’s been a while since I posted – we had three birthdays in November to celebrate and then the Christmas madness began. It’s Dec 20 and I finally feel inspired to write. I also have a few posts that I wrote throughout the month that I will be posting this week as well.
I just started reading this great book called The Power of Less and I’m excited about it. I’m inspired – which usually means that this book will probably inspire change in me. I really need to work on my Fit by Forty goal. My goal to streamline my possessions – imagine choosing only 200 items in your house to keep – what would you keep? And most importantly – I want to save money so that I can go back to school. More on these another time - and if you want to check out the author’s website its ZenHabits.net
And what are your thoughts on this: You see, over the summer a nice lady watched my girls, my three and seven year old girls. She has three kids herself and I realized this summer – has a very laid back way of supervising them. I’ve known her for three years, she is very active in the school my oldest attended and as I said before she is very nice. She mentioned to me before that she doesn’t “hover” over her kids when they play. She likes them to have their own experiences. And it got me thinking about how I hover around my kids while they play. I listen nearby, I find things to do in the room next to where they are playing, I watch cartoons with them, I don’t let them out of my sight when they are playing outside, these types of things. I mean, that’s what mom’s do right? But it got me wondering if we can over-supervise our kids. When I was a kid – probably from the age of 6 or 7, I was allowed to go outside and play on my own, unsupervised. Granted, we lived in a rural area where there was little or no traffic and lots of fields and tree’s. I would go out for hours and tromp through fields, abandoned barns, apple orchards and around the lake. Having that freedom was so amazing. I think I learned to be very independent and self-reliant by being unsupervised. I learned some life lessons – like never to tromp through ponds without rain boots if you wanted to stay comfortable, to never use the front brakes on my bike to slow down quickly and that once your toes were cold it was time to go home. Thankfully I was never mauled by a bear (something I would worry about now but never thought about back then), run over by a car travelling down our dirt road or hurt myself climbing fences and trees. But these days, especially in the city, you can just never be too careful. I remember picking my kids up at school one day. It was freezing cold and the kids were happily playing on the ice that had formed in the school yard. The lady that usually picked up the girls was chatting happily with her other mom friends while the kids slipped and slid on the ice – unsupervised. I hung back from the mom’s because I wanted to make sure the kids weren’t abducted by some passing stranger or hurt while sliding on the ice. I found it appalling that this nice lady who was to be supervising my kids wasn’t even looking at them! In fact, her view of them and her own children was obstructed by a line of trees. Gah! And herein is what I’m referring too. These questions run through my head. Am I being too paranoid? Am I not giving my children enough space? Will they come to expect someone to be there for them all the time and never learn to act or think independently? I’ve been there for them everyday of their lives, and I will continue to be there if they need me, but do I need to constantly supervise them even when they are in the house? Do I need to get my own life back so I can stop obsession about them (ahem, yes)? I’d love to live in a rural area again so I can let my girls have their own experiences and be back at “home base” in case they need me. I don’t think I’ll ever be the type of mom who can leave my kids unsupervised in a school yard. I feel more content watching them than not watching them. But I will pause and reflect on how much simpler my life would be if I just let it go and didn’t worry so much.